By: Stewart Brennan
Recently I had the privilege of listening to a 1991 recording of Terence McKenna addressing the Jung Society in Clairmont California. (See embedded player below) As I listened to Terence McKenna speak on an array of topics involving the human mind and the history of spiritualism and psychedelics it was like a door to my past had been thrown open to release my own personal experiences, perceptions, spirituality and psychedelic experience by his illuminating words. But there was one particular experience I had with Psilocybin (Magic Mushrooms) around 1979 that came rushing back in all its familiarity and mind boggling prescience. I was compelled to write it down to make more sense of it and now share it here on this blog post.
The year was 1979 and the place was my basement bedroom, which was my personal sanctuary. Being curious and a bit adventurous I decided to try magic mushrooms to see what the experience was all about. During this experience I had a moment that can only be described as being in a state of higher awakened consciousness…it seemed like I transported to an alternate world.
The transit to this state of consciousness happened so fast…looking back, it was as though an entity of light watching over me, revealed himself and showed me the impression or imprint of my entire life.
At the beginning of this experience I felt as though I was in an empty space of darkness with the illumination of light around me...kind of like street lights lighting up the darkness the way a single candle would a room. In this light I was urged forward by a comforting presence. In front of me and in silence was a tall building…like a skyscraper…the presence was then behind me and emitted feelings of reassurance that I understood as words…we were on what I perceived to be a platform elevator on the ground outside the building when the elevator began to lift.
Slowly the platform lifted as I looked directly at the building in front of me. Up we went without a word. There was an empathic understanding that everything was ok and natural… looking at the building in front of me, I noticed that the lights seemed to be off on the first few floors of the building but as the unseen platform rose light started to appear and grew in illumination the higher we went. As the experience unfolded I began to recognize emotional familiarity of past experiences in my early life which materialized through scenes behind the windows…they were strange but comforting feelings as We began moving up the outside of the building…and as I continued to peer into the windows I realized that I was seeing moments of my life and that on each floor were the compacted moments of a full year in my life. The higher we went, the faster the years went by and the brighter it was all around me and inside the building…soon I began to sense and glimpse some of the future experiences I was to have but without knowing the details. It was all understood by emotional recognition. At one point I was amazed that I was to live longer than I had envisioned…which wasn’t very old, I sensed my late 40’s but couldn't see details…however I felt that I was going to get very sick, but then soon recover. As I sensed my recovery, the light around me and on each floor after became brighter and brighter and I felt greater confidence As the elevator moved further up the building and years of my life. The velocity upwards increased, blurring the clarity of the vision and blocking details but impressed upon me that years were quickly passing and always I recognized the familiarity of my emotional self there. I was astonished at how high the number of years were increasing until I couldn’t look anymore, as I did not want to see my death. I closed my eyes tight as I looked away and it felt like I had launched into space away from the building and into the candle lit darkness.
The presence or the being that accompanied my assent outside the building was no longer with me as I then found myself drifting and descending towards a room below me. An image began to appear that looked like a rounded tower from a castle with an arched opening where long shadows and light emerged from its doorway into the darkness…I felt a presence was in there as I entered with a sense of guarded uncertainty, not knowing who or what I might find.
But just as quickly, assurance and calm flooded over me as I found the presence that had accompanied me on my experience. He spoke in thoughts to let me know that I could remain a bit longer but that once I began looking for details in the experience the moment would be over and I would awake from this subconscious state. I wanted to stay in that moment to ask questions but then found myself waking into the present, back in the basement room where I woke to a sense of astonishment and then exuberant feelings of joy...and also with an unexplained experience that would tuck itself away into my memory, to be recalled later on in my life and serve as confirmation to unfolding events.
Even now at 53 years of age, I do not know the details that were revealed to me that evening but I certainly recognize some of those passing moments I saw through the windows of that building as they unfold in my life now. I did indeed get very sick in my 40’s and emerged from it with an awakening of consciousness, spirit and knowledge…and I now understand more of what my purpose in life is as I grow in confidence and vision everyday. I have begun to see things clearly, sometimes I see things before they happen…I feel connected with something greater than myself and I sense it all around me. I know others are feeling it as well. It’s best described as an Awakening as I feel we are in times where events are happening faster and faster than anytime before in human history. Terence McKenna explained it through his work and opened the doors for us to see our own experiences, our understanding of them, and our interconnectedness to something greater. I'm beginning to understand his insights more everyday. He was truly a great mind, sage and teacher, and because of Terence McKenna that moment in 1979 when I was 19 years old, now makes more sense to me than it ever did.
Looking back, I strongly believe that my entire life’s imprint was revealed to me in a brief awakened moment, and today, I feel in phase with a growing awareness that is rising within all of us.-----------------------------
Terence McKenna – Global Perspectives and Psychedelic Poetics
Video Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCpoj3Do2CI
Address To The Jung Society - Terence McKenna
Video Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWoHLcHC0oM
Art & Expressions of SFBrennanhttp://sfbrennanart.blogspot.ca/
Terence McKenna Archive
The Entheogen Portal